I would offer hugs
but my hugs would have no warmth;
Pixels place upon a screen
that lack a beating heart.
I would say I'm sorry,
but it's naught but empty words;
Pixels placed upon a screen
can't take away the hurt.
Some Deep Poem About EmotionsI was going to write some deep poem about emotions
and a teenager at their wit's end
but when you are that kid
the things that you think are deep in your head
are not quite the same when written on paper.
The intent gets jumbled somewhere along the way
between the right side of the brain and the fingertips
and both are perhaps a little too stimulated by caffeine
at three in the morning when you can't sleep.
I was going to write some deep poem about emotions
and not knowing what to do
but had an existential crisis halfway through the first sentence
and now I've gone from questioning the meaning of a word
to questioning the meaning of my existence.
The intent gets jumbled somewhere along the way
when the left brain decides this is a stupid idea
and sends it to wherever unused and rejected thoughts go
when, like you, they are deemed not good enough.
I was going to write some deep poem about emotions
but instead I wrote this.
~April 16, 2014~
Humanity takes over and soon crumbles.
The core of bloodied steel remains.
~March 17, 2014~
So I Fell.When I was five years old
I thought life would always be good
thought my best friend and I
would always be together
thought I'd always be that happy and carefree
thought nothing in the world
could ever bring me down.
By the time I was nine I had learned by myself
that every problem, challenge, little obstacle
was Mount Everest
and I was climbing it with my bare hands
that what everyone told me was just a little
was a cliff a thousand miles high
with sharp rocks at the bottom
and I had no other way to go
At twelve I was pushed off that cliff
before I was ready
somehow I missed the jagged stone spikes
but the ocean surf at the bottom
crushed me against the smooth unyielding rock
slammed me into it again and again and again
until my very soul felt battered and bruised
and the effort of trying to find a handhold
of trying to hold on just for a moment
became too much for my damaged being.
As a youth of fourteen I finally sank
beneath that dark sea
felt cold water sw
These nightsInsomniac nights
don't do much for the self esteem
don't exactly soothe a damaged psyche
don't mend a tattered heart
No, these nights
don't do wonders for the soul
don't exactly make me feel at home
don't mend every open wound
are when my thoughts get to wander
and drag me unwilling out the door
til my teardrops mingle with
freshly fallen snow.
~January 22, 2014~
This Time Next YearThis time last year
I read a message saying
Go kill yourself,
got a text that read
I hate you so much,
opened a letter with only
I wish I never met you
written on the inside.
This time last year
I heard my own thoughts screaming
Just do it already,
in between bouts of
Nobody cares about you,
spread out among whispers of
Everyone wants you gone
circling 'round my own head.
This time last year
I sobbed into a dream
I'll never be good enough,
stared into the mirror thinking
I'll never be pretty enough,
watched others pass me by saying
You'll never be like them
because I never was.
This time next year
I'll recall words criticizing
You should try to fit in,
remember teachers griping
You could do so much better,
look down at myself mumbling
You did what you could
and be done.
ArtIt's so long past midnight
yet my light remains on.
I have been wide awake
since the break of sweet dawn.
And I know it's so late
but I can't seem to rest.
Every time I breathe in
I feel hands on my chest.
Side by side, flesh to flesh,
I was yours to the end.
Only you, always true,
at least that’s what you said.
Still my heart has its doubts
little signs here and there.
All the fear points to you
and the falsehood of care.
All your words are fine silk
I'm afraid to believe.
I am trapped in your mind
and it's too dark for me.
So I'll stay in the night
and I'll watch what you do.
And you will see, darling,
I can lie to you, too.
I hope you won't hate me
when I tear out your heart.
Though I said I'd forgive
I've made grudges an art.
~December 15, 2013~
Slept InSlept in.
Looked at the clock;
I could still make it to school
if I tried.
But I really don't want to.
It's funny to me
how in middle school,
I would scream and cry
if I missed the bus
or woke up late.
Now I shrug and say,
"them's the breaks,"
nestle under blankets
go back to hating
~December 5th, 2013~
KnucklesPlace a kiss on
broken skin; bruised flesh
above the bone.
on a scarred but beautiful heart.
I know not what
deep and fearsome pains
plague your psyche.
But I will be here
to hold you when you need it most
~November 22, 2013~
What Certain People of Tumblr Don't UnderstandThere is literally nothing wrong with being cis,
your very existence does not make you transphobic.
You are not an oppressor by default,
do not blame yourself for someone else’s transphobia,
because it’s not your fault.
Racism isn’t restricted to just whites.
Anyone can be a racist,
you need only express a prejudice.
Sexism is practically the same,
no matter the gender,
it goes both ways.
Mental illness is not some fad,
it’s not something to be tossed around so freely,
like some badge.
It’s not something you can self-diagnose you have,
therefore using it as an excuse to act like an ass.
There is a stigma created when you act out, you see.
And the world associates mental illness
with your disgusting tendencies.
It is horrific and cruel to use mental illness as an excuse,
especially when the illness you claim to have is not
Feminism is not for every boy, man, woman or girl.
It is not a cure that will heal inequality in our world.
I Loved MoreI loved him more than anything else.
More than meaningful poems and stormy nights.
More than wild, careless dancing and hot chocolate.
More than touching words and laughter that leaves you in happy tears.
More than spring mornings and starry skies.
More than friendly gatherings and lovely, bear hugs.
More than cat kisses and catchy songs,
More than the sun and the moon and my heartbeat, too.
He always came first, always him, only him.
Stupid, reckless, fragile heart..it was broken in the end.
I loved him more than anything else.
And sometimes he loved me, too..when he wanted to.
I loved more and I paid the price of that famous, one-sided love...
Now, I'm heartbroken and alone, but I am free and somehow happy.
But, I am me and I will love again even if I fail, I will love again...
did you know you hurt me?the girl
who calls herself
my best friend
doesn't know i've smoked cigarettes
since i was 14
in 9th grade,
and she thought i was just as
as she pretended
she doesn't know
about the empty pill
scattered across my desk,
ones i've started storing dead flowers
she thinks i don't eat
because i'm really not
and when she came to visit me
in the hospital
she believed that it was just my lungs
to believe everyone
is perfect and
when life has always
and you've never cried yourself to sleep
or heard your father say he wished your mother
when you've never been slammed against the lockers
or taken a picture
with a black eye
and broken nose.
when you've gotten everything
you could ever be bothered
when you're the one
who breaks lovers'
it's easier for you
then it will ever be for me,
and you're walking away
to cheer on someone else's sidelines
while i walk through
LifeWhat is life?
Life is something, that we must to respect, something that we hae only one time, something that we must feel inside of us
Our life can be hard or cruel sometimes, but you must learn to live with it, do the best out of it and maybe you can change something in your heart and other once hearts.
Live your life in this way like you feel, be free, be yourself
We dont know the meaning of life.. but we still know what we want: We want to live and that matters.
Even when you go through the biggest adventure, and dont find yourself anymore, there will be people in your life who still helping you out of your misery, no matter what happened
You can be heartless, you can be sad, you even can hate everything, but remember, even when you are one of those persons, you still have something to live for and you always have love inside of your heart. Make yourself proud and dont lose hope or the way you go, you will always be part of something big and fantastic
Never lose your hope and i pro
Autism Is Not A DiseaseSome say it's a virus,
That spreads like the plague,
Until there's nothing left,
But for those with autism,
When we're normal human beings,
Yes we are different,
But isn't everyone else,
Like for those who are bright,
While other's are dumb?
Sure our brains are wired,
All over the place,
Making it harder,
For us to think.
But it doesn't matter,
When no one's the same.
And Believe me,
This world would be a bore,
If we knew our every move,
Knowing what everyone would do.
So let's hear it:
Am I a disease,
Or a living human being?
I'm Sorry For Being a RapistI'm sorry for being a rapist,
though I never even touched you.
I'm sorry for assaulting you,
though all I did was gently brush you.
We were in a crowded subway,
what more could you expect?
Someone bumped up against me,
and my raised hand went to your chest.
I'm sorry for being abusive,
even though I'm just three.
I'm sorry for crying in front of you,
because I’m supposed to be strong.
I'm sorry for being gay,
because society doesn't like it that way.
I'm sorry for being your boss,
even though I worked extremely hard.
As opposed to you, I came from nothing,
and had to earn my family's butter and bread.
We escaped a communist country,
from a government who wanted us dead.
But you wouldn't know that,
because to you we're all the same.
I'm sorry for calling you a bitch,
after you carelessly called me a bastard.
Or calling you a slut,
when you cheated on my friend, and his life ended in self inflicted disaster.
I'm sorry for earning more than you,
but you know you can go to court.
HetaliaxDepressed!Reader:Self-Inflicted AchromaticHetalia x Scary! Depressed! Reader: Self-Inflicted Achromatic
I want to be a person just like you, don't you see?
I want to be a person who is still being "me"
A tired sigh escaped your lips. You were just so damn tired. The other countries said that you, (f/n) or (c/n), was scarier than Russia himself. But of course, you have lived 2500 years with wars and bloodshed always trailing after you. You just really want to be happy. But all those wars and blood imprinted on your mind, you really just released off a dark (a/c) aura and a stoic atmosphere.
It really would be nice but I'm paying a price
'Cause I'd really, not be me and that would not suffice
You asked yourself, "I know my face doesn't show my pain. But isn't it obvious in my eyes? I'm lonely and hurt" You rubbed your numb (s/c) wrist, yesterday's cuts still had a colorless ache to it. You picked your silver knife, twirling it around watching the others argue. The said knife is the one you also use to cut yourself.
A dream which
Being Cis Isn't EasyBeing Cis is Easy
So I suppose that when I was kicked out last night,
for being gay,
that my pain meant nothing,
because let’s face it, i'm cis, anyway.
I think that the marks on my wrist are just ketchup stains,
because i'm cis, so I can't bleed,
Did you know, I'm invincible to pain?
Racism isn't a thing if you're a cisgendered male,
be you black, white or whatever,
you can't experience racism, so why even tell?
Misandry nor misogyny exist of your cis,
so girls and boys, let's stop this confusion,
let's just do away with this.
Depression, huh! Do you mean a cry for attention?
Because if you're cis and experiencing this,
don't bother mentioning it.
And you can't be bullied, you cis scum!
So stop telling us that you are,
because we know you're just making it up.
A broken family, bitch please!
Everyone knows that
cisgendered brats have everything.
Call me stingy, but I ask one thing,
I beg of you to keep the
label “cis” away from me.
Because you love to put us al
Through The FlameThrough The Flame:
Can you feel it in the winds?
The chilling cries of blood-lust that sing through the air...
May your people weep at the destruction that is to come;
While you mortals cower behind your wards of flesh and steel!
How does it feel I wonder,
This question I ask
To those who have spent their entire existence
Amassing power over their fellows...
Know now that your paltry gestures;
Your pseudo-might is but dust,
Cast into the violent wind of a whirling typhoon!
Now, tremble within your hovels of concrete and steel,
For I am rage incarnate and I have come to ensure,
That your world will burn...